Friday, March 6, 2009

Blind Review Friday

Blind Review Friday.

The author shall remain anonymous (unless they chose to divulge themselves in the comments.)

Those commenting are also welcome to remain anonymous if they wish.

Incendiary comments will be removed.

If you would like your piece thrown to the wolves send it to with "Workshop the hell out of this poem" as the subject line.

Last week's piece - My Father's Coat - was by poetry slam founder Marc Smith.

This week's offering is from a Clevelandpoetics - The Blog reader:

[un]Phenomenal Woman

There she was
…souped up face
…knock off threads
…chain store acrylics
Stuntin’ throw back shades
A huge façade
A common mirage
Created to catch you slippin’
Tripped up from surface beauty (shell shock),
you failed to see her insides brewing multiple pots of
…coping mechanisms
…negative self images
…life lessons
Taught her worth was measured
by the girth of her hips
…the sway of her spine
…the size of her onion
Blessed with an abundance of pigmentation
Consistently underestimated…she’s even contemplated bleaching creams a time or three
She be talking loud and saying nothing
She be saying nothing just talking loud
She be proud…of the wrong things
The obvious Indian in her family that loosely coils her hair instead of kinks it
Yet she thinks it looks better under the latest lace-front the media encourages her to buy
And though she rocks perfect plaits beneath its weft, she’d never be brave enough to let her soul glow
She be proud…of the wrong things
Talking loud…about the wrong things
Negotiating food stamp favors to look good shaking what her momma gave her
Spittin’ venomous lyrics to soda-pop dealers for rides in pimped whips with 22 inch kicks
Be talking loud over bass rattling plastic covered windows
Be talking loud enough to echo through the boarded up homes consuming her hood
Be talking loud over sirens
…baby wails
…ringing cells
…even over the 80 year old lady that provides shelter for her baby’s daddy for free
But she just talking loud
…and saying nothing


John B. Burroughs said...

Dig that!

Anonymous said...

Very nice. I like tha cadence of the piece.

Anonymous said...

Probably good live...doesn't do too much for me on the page.


The poet doesn't invent. He listens. ~Jean Cocteau